Top Tags

The critical leadership skill

Self awareness.  Most people think they’re aware. They are not. [What they’re aware of are their stories about themselves.] In 2007, a Harvard Business Review article reported that the 75-person advisory council for Stanford’s business school was asked about the most important skill for a leader to develop. Their responses were nearly unanimous: self awareness.

I was surfing other blogs today and came across this entry, from another female entrepreneur. Her language is a little more down to earth than HBR’s. Check it out at her blog.

Here’s a distinction I often make for my coaching clients. Self awareness comes in many forms. The one we’re most familiar with is awareness of our strengths, limitations, talents, and so forth. People who get to the top in organizations know what they’re good at and surround themselves with people who complement them.

Another form of self awareness is the one that, when missing, can tank a career. It’s awareness of how others actually experience us … and it is much rarer. People who’ve mastered this form can hold their own story while seeing their words and deeds from others’ perspectives as well.

Here’s an exercise. For the next few weeks, come to work meetings early, take a seat, and pay attention to how people behave toward you as they enter the room. Where do they sit?  What, if anything, do they say, and to whom? Jot down what you notice. Pay attention also to what you’re telling yourself about what you’re observing. Jot that down, too.

After a few weeks, review your notes. What do you notice that you weren’t aware of before?